It's not a tumor

I've found that when people in a relationship find out that I'm single they automatically assume that it's not by choice. They also assume that it is their job to cure me of the horrific disease of singleness. It's not a disease. If you were to hug me you wouldn't immediately have thoughts of breaking up with your significant other. Although, I have been told before that I'm quite the hugger so maybe you will.

This calamity becomes especially evident when there is a holiday or major event coming up. On Friday, July 2nd, I went for a walk to try and get some exercise. It was a beautiful evening and turned out to be perfect for a little stroll. On my way back to my house, I walked through the neighborhood and stopped to chat with some of my neighbors. My current living situation may have it's ups and downs but I do have some incredibly nice neighbors. I couldn't ask for better people to share a community with. Their kids were out playing some hide and seek (it took all of my power not to join in), having popsicles and other adorable activities while the parents and I were engaged in conversation. It was all going so well until they asked me what my plans for July 4th were. I told them I didn't have any and it was as if the world was coming to an end. I could see their wheels turning as though they didn't understand what I meant. The first question I received after making this announcement was, "By the way, what ever happened to that girl you went out with a few weeks ago?" That's when it all came together. There is an assumption that I did not have plans because I am single. If the situation were different and I were in a relationship I would undoubtedly have some form of plans.

Side note...that's not necessarily true. There are a few things that bore me to tears. Fireworks, and parades are two of them. I know that makes me sound like I'm wearing an Osama bin Laden t-shirt right now but that's not true. I'm of the belief that if you've seen one fireworks show, you've seen them all. Same with parades except I think my distaste for parades goes back to my childhood. I had to march in every town Christmas parade growing up as a part of either my elementary school, sports teams or cub scouts. There was no way out for me. On the lucky years when I wouldn't have to march, or I'd duck out early, I was forced to grab as much candy off the ground as I could as if it were going to be our dinner for the rest of the holiday season.

Saturday, July 3rd, I went to the gym in the morning to get in a quick workout. All of my workouts are quick these days because I have a monstrous knee brace on my right leg. I can only do half of my normal work because all exercises that involve muscles below the belt are out. When I returned home one of my neighbors was out playing soccer with his nearly 3 year old son. He called to me from across the grassy knoll and at first I thought it was because his son kicked the ball by him and he needed some help chasing it. A lot of good I would be here. I can barely walk let alone kick a soccer ball. However, that was not his goal. He came over and asked, "How old are you?" This question is nearly always followed with, "Are you single?" Sure enough, he did not disappoint and did come through with the follow up. I answered both and he then told me he knew someone he wanted to set me up with.

I'm not opposed to the idea of a set up but there are some things that I don't like about it.

1) It makes me feel inadequate. It's as though that since I'm nearly 30 years old and I'm single, they think I do not have the capacity of finding a woman on my own.
2) It creates a dangerous situation. If things go well that's fantastic but if they do not, it can be horrible. If it doesn't work out there are the constant glares from the setter upper that scream, "what was wrong with her huh? Do you think you're too good for her?" Fair questions but the reality is probably something much more simple like she's a huge Yankees fan or something.
3) No one will ever know what is perfect for you. I flat out do not like the phrase, "She's perfect for you." I've always wondered how people know that. Especially people I don't talk to very much.
4) Physical attracting is important. The initial physical spark must be there but I'm looked at as a pig if I ask the setter upper, "Is she cute?" More disapproving looks come after that question. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder but it is my eye that is important.

That wasn't the only set up attempt over the weekend. On July 5th my roommate said she knew someone she wanted me to meet. She suggested that we all go for a bike ride. Sounds cute right? Well it isn't considering I can't bend my right knee. Somehow my roommate had forgotten that I had this obscene device on my leg for the last month, and could have it even longer.

I guess the moral of the story is that not everyone that is single doesn't want to be. Would I like to wake up next to the woman of my dreams every morning? Yes but Scarlett Johansson is unavailable. I may not be making a conscious effort to stay single but I'm certainly not trying too hard to not be single.